Eye of the Beholder

I always thought I was model material. I mean, I knew I never could be because of my built, a runway model that is, but I had a chance at being a photographic one. (side note: why the perpetual wetness?) Usual group photos and school pictures are terrible. You gotta smile, for some odd reason I think I’m prettier photographic wise when I’m not smiling..I see people model all the time and I take the photos all the time. But not usual model photos, oh no, I mean a random girl in a skirt texting somebody at a bus stop, silly models like that. I can imagine myself right now in my undies, black and white photo for this one, left leg up on the table, right on the ground as it always is, hair curled and everywhere eyes staring at screen that little black line blinking and patiently waiting for a thought to come out. Anyway, not the point. Model runway thing on the 19th. And I’m always told at these things that I have a knack for walking down those, but I never get picked up. Mainly cause I’m not a beanpole. Which is fine…watching world’s next top model whatever with gracie, If someone tried to kick me off I would say to them, “So I’m not beautiful? Tell me I’m not beautiful in these cameras” That’s a problem, it all has it’s beauty and they’re all gorgeous girls. Funny part is the people telling them that their natural beauty ain’t right aren’t the prettiest things on this side of the earth either. The hair idea on the black woman that is really a guy is um…it don’t fit buddy, sorreh. Yes, I admit, I model in my mirror. I get caught up, I find myself doing imaginary photoshoots (of course this is usually round midnite when homework is tiresome and everyone’s asleep) not photo shoots only though. I mean, models may be beautiful (some aren’t as pretty as ones that aren’t models but that’s my opinion) but there’s nothing to it. They don’t speak. Half the beauty should be the inside at least, moreso if you ask me. *shrugs* dunno what I’m getting at. Guess I’m gonna take a lil’ siesta before picking up Rebecca, sara, brit, and mr. camera for academy’s play…woo